Bosom Buddy Commercial: “I had the Snoopy nose. I wanted the perky boobs!”

Ladies, let’s talk about your breasts.

The above is the opening line of the infomercial for Bosom Buddy. No, it’s not that 1980s TV series starring Tom Hanks and Peter Scolari, although their characters on the show might have benefited from it.

Bosom Buddy is an exercise device like Easy Curves that promises larger, firmer breasts. The Bosom Buddy is wishbone-shaped and every woman who pushes and pulls its handles wishes this thing will really work to give her bodacious ta-tas.

The most magical thing about the Easy Curves commercial, however, is not the product, but the line at 1:35:

“I had the Snoopy nose. I wanted the perky boobs!” may be the greatest testimonial ever uttered on a broadcast infomercial.

Not being an expert on mammary terminology, I don’t know if “Snoopy nose” is a common phrase used to describe a particular breast shape or if that woman just made it up herself.

All I know is that I’ll never read Peanuts the same way again.