Blog - Ridiculous Infomercial Review

Back in April of last year, I wrote about the Spanish infomercial for Karakol Kream. Karakol Kream is a skin care product made from snails. Throughout the infomercial, they show a computer-generated graphic of a snail. I thought the whole thing was a strange Latin American peculiarity, kind of like that guy on Univision who dresses up as a bee. I wrote, “Perhaps the snail has some kind of cultural significance in Latin culture that I don’t know about, because I can’t image that any English-language infomercial for skin care would ever show a picture of a snail (CGI or not)…”

Well it turns out my assessment was completely and utterly wrong! A skin care company called BioCutis has produced an English-language infomercial selling a snail “secretion” serum called BioSkinCare. And the BioSkinCare infomercial doesn’t show just some stylized computer graphic of a snail like the Spanish infomercial—they show lots of real photos of slimly, ugly snails crawling around in dirt.

I’m not sure if this thing has aired on broadcast TV yet, but the videos are available on YouTube:

You got to love the audio syncing and video quality. I thought I was watching Max Headroom for a while there.

But wait, there’s more. Here they assure us that no snails were harmed in the making of BioSkinCare!

Apparently this amazing discovery came about when a “snail farm in Chile noticed that their snail handlers had exceptionally smooth hands”—which I’m sure must have been a major blow to the machismo of the Chilean snail handlers.

Here are two must see videos for any “fan” of infomercial pitchman Kevin Trudeau, author of Natural Cures “They” Don’t Want You to About, The Weight Loss Cure “They” Don’t Want You to Know About, and Debt Cures “They” Don’t Want You to Know About.

The first is a report from investigative reporter John Stossel that aired on the TV show 20/20 in 2006:

The thing that was most striking to me in that report was that Tammy Faye Bakker actually hosted one of Kevin Trudeau’s infomercials!! How in the world could I have missed that one?!

I’m also sorry I never saw that infomercial where he used some kind of tape to cure pain!

And after seeing that you’ll really appreciate this Mad TV sketch in which “Robin Kirkly” promotes his book “Miracle Natural Cures Formula” on an infomercial:

A very funny sketch that nicely captures Trudeau’s mixture of greed and paranoia.

I recently posted a review of the latest ExtenZe infomercial, which promotes their new “male enhancement drink.” In my review I wrote, “I’m sure that vending machines throughout North America will soon be stocking the ExtenZe beverage right next to the Diet Pepsi and Mountain Dew.” I thought I was making a joke. But check out this commercial video for ExtenZe where they indeed show it being stocked alongside other beverages at some supermarket (though it looks like they expect it to be stocked with the Red Bull and Rockstar energy drinks).

Also, part of the new ExtenZe infomercial takes place at the Playboy mansion. It turns out that ExtenZe was a sponsor of Playboy’s 2008 Super Bowl party, along with the electronic payment services company xchangeAgent and some kind of social networking website with the curious name Financially Hung.

StarMedia was also there and conducted interviews with Bridgetta Tomarchio as well as with the women dressed up as ExtenZe cheerleaders:

Finally, that poster child for mental hygiene, Steve-O—best known for his work on the TV show Jackass—has a video in which he drinks a cocktail of vodka mixed with ExtenZe. Even through his drunken rambling it is clear that Steve-O heartily recommends the ExtenZe beverage and thinks it is a better mixer than energy drinks:

I’m so glad that Steve-O has found a healthier beverage to replace those “bad for you” energy drinks.

Take a look at these screenshots from a recent Spanish infomercial and tell me what kind of product you think this man is selling:

With his gold chain, unbuttoned patterned shirt, and David Hasselhoff hair, Omar Alexander looks like he could star as the swinging hot tub guy in the Spanish version of the “Make a Jack Sandwich” commercial. And the name of the company is Laboratorios Venus (Venus Laboratories), named after the Roman goddess of love—the same word from which “venereal disease” is derived.

So what do you think this man is selling?

When I first saw this infomercial some of the products I thought it might be promoting were: a male enhancement pill like ExtenZe, discount Viagra, marital aids, or some kind of love making manual.

But I was wrong. In spite of his lounge lizard looks, Omar Alexander is actually selling a skin care product called Crema De Concha Nacar (Mother-of-pearl shell cream).

And check out the “before and after” pictures on this video:

I don’t know if I’d buy their skin care product, but if I ever need any photo editing done I’m definitely giving Venus Labs a call!

I’ve posted a full review of the latest version of the ExtenZe male enhancement pills infomercial.

Apparently, it is the 7th year anniversary of the ExtenZe infomercial being on the air. So we’ve all been blessed with 7 wonderful years of Ron Jeremy making irrelevant jokes and Bridgetta Tomarchio showing off her boobs…not to mention guys with small wee-wees taking pills in a desperate attempt to end up hung like a horse.

The latest version of the ExtenZe infomercial has the following highlights:

• They unveil an ExtenZe “male enhancement beverage” that comes in a soda can.
• Bridgetta Tomarchio returns as hostess.
• They go to the Playboy mansion where they bore some playmates with questions about ExtenZe as well as ask them, “Does size matter?”

Check it out: ExtenZe Sex Talk.