Blog - Ridiculous Infomercial Review

As I said in my Recip-Ease post, I really think that infomercial marketers are just running out of ideas. The latest example of this is Popabrella, which is an umbrella specially designed for cameras:

Bright sunlight may be the bane of many who have tried to take a photo outdoors. And the Popabrella infomercial earnestly wants to make us believe that just using a hand, hat, or clothing to block the sunlight is tremendously burdensome. Yet somehow attaching an umbrella which is bigger than the camera itself is “easy” and more convenient.

But, the Popabrella infomercial reminds us, bright sunlight isn’t the only challenge faced by the outdoor photographer. “Even under a downpour your camera is protected,” they assure us. We all know that the worst thing about a Category 5 hurricane is that it prevents you from taking snapshots of your family in the flower garden. With Popabrella, you can at long last spend the entire monsoon season snapping photo after photo in the great outdoors.

Popabrella does seem like a great product, but the application shown on the infomercial is all wrong. Instead of positioning it as some sort of camera accessory, Popabrella should be sold as a giant cocktail umbrella for those massive Mai Tais and mega-sized Margaritas! Maybe it could be offered as a free bonus with every purchase of The Party Bullet.

Who knew there was such a thriving market for devices to help sneak booze into sports stadia! The Bootlegger let people strap a mini-bar to their ankles, and now Papa Bert’s Sippin’ Seat lets you carry a cushion secretly filled with your favorite alcoholic liquid:

One downside of this ingenious device is that when you use it to pour beer everyone will assume you are relieving yourself in a cup!

They call the plastic container that actually holds the liquid an “internal, flexible flask.” Good that it is entirely covered by the cushion during use, because it looks less like a “flask” than a catheter’s urine bag.

The commercial states, “It can hold both warm and cold beverages and will keep them a certain temperature for up to five hours.” Too bad that “certain temperature” just happens to be the same temperature as your butt cheeks.

The Sippin’ Seat is “…able to hold up to 300 pounds of pressure.” The target market for this thing is men who like to sit down, watch sports, and drink beer, so a 300 pound weight limit isn’t going to be nearly enough. Though perhaps it might encourage all those 290 pound guys to stay trim.

Considering the popularity of chili cheese dogs among such people, the commercial should have made clear that the cushion and “flask” are indeed going to prevent their beverage from becoming infused with the aroma of their own flatulence.

The weirdest thing about this video, however, is the use of “We Three Kings of Orient Are” as background music. Papa Bert’s Sippin’ Seat doesn’t seem like the ideal device to smuggle gold, frankincense or myrrh.

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The latest infomercial in the Magic Bullet franchise has debuted! In The Party Bullet Mick, Mimi, and Hazel (!) return. The producers of this one have really ramped up the humor and campiness in an earnest attempt to make this thing go viral:

In the Party Bullet infomercial, Mick and Mimi are hurrying to get to a wedding they are already late for. With them are cigarette-chomping Hazel, a fan favorite character not seen since the Magic Bullet to Go infomercial, and a new character named Sherman, who continues the tradition of the fat-life-of-the-party role previously supplied by Berman and Ralph.

As the result of the kind of wacky mix up seen on 1950s sitcoms, they end up in a room where a funeral is being held. Mick and company do not realize what has happened. Yes, they know no one there and there is a casket at the front of the room, yet they still don’t grasp they have mistakenly barged into someone’s funeral. Maybe they were drunk already.

After making some inappropriate comments, Mick whips out his Party Bullet, “the world’s first countertop mixologist.” A mirrored disco ball somehow shows up, and the funeral guests begin eagerly drinking, dancing, and generally behaving like the cast of Jersey Shore. Sherman hits on the grieving widow and tells the priest, “C’mon, father. You can’t spell ‘funeral’ without F-U-N.” Mick makes a midget joke.

Such a scene of revelry at a funeral might risk being offensive. At the end, however, Mick knocks on the coffin, and the man inside knocks back. So there really wasn’t a dead man there…just a man about to be buried alive. Another wacky mix up!

With the Party Bullet, the makers of the Magic Bullet line have given up the pretense that anyone is using their products to make guacamole, alfredo sauce, or muffin batter. They finally admit that anyone who buys their stuff does it so they can get smashed. To this end, they announce recipes for “signature cocktails” named after the characters on the infomercial: the Mickarita, Mimito, Hazeltini, and Sherma Colada.

Fans of characters on the previous Magic Bullet infomercials will be forced to come up with their own recipes for the Bermanhattan and the Grandmai Tai.

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A big thank you on the rocks with salt to Jack Carnighan for letting us know about the Party Bullet infomercial!

The Neck Right inflatable neck pillow is very similar to the Dr Ho Neck Comforter product. The infomercial for Neck Right, however, was produced by Fred Vanore’s Blue Moon Studios, the same company the made the Snuggie infomercial. The trademark directorial vision of the auteurs at Blue Moon Studios brings out subtle nuances wholly absent from the Dr. Ho ad:

The Dr Ho Neck Comforter infomercial featured a goofy demo of the product lifting up a bowling ball plastered with a smiley face. But here a series of vignettes show the Neck Right being used by grandpa watching TV, by grandma riding in the car, by mom cooking dinner, and of course at the office. By seeing the product in various everyday situations, viewers will be thoroughly convinced that wearing a Neck Right will really work to make people look like dorks, goofs, weenies, dweebs, and weirdos.

Unlike the Dr Ho ad, the Neck Right infomercial fails to address the burning question at the forefront everyone’s mind: “Will my head pop off?”
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Every parent wants to encourage their children to hallucinate, but offering them peyote, LSD, and magic mushrooms presents certain legal and medical complications.

Luckily, the Cypher Kids Club offers these Live 3D Interactive Cards:

Now with this “augmented reality” your kids can enjoy all the fun of dementia without having to wait until they reach their 70s!

According to the infomercial, Cypher Kids is the “coolest new way to learn and play.” And won’t you be proud when your 8-year-old stands in front of his class and reports to them that lions and elephants are 6 inches tall, have no weight, and regularly eat from the palm of his hand.

And once your kids have learned all about the animal kingdom, they can begin learning about money with the help of the talking George Washington dollar coin.

As bizarre as the 3D animals featured on the the Cypher Kids Club infomercial might be, at least this company took the time to come up with a new product instead of cranking out yet another Pillow Pets rip-off.