Mitch’s Green Flush Saves Water Every Time You Flush Bananas and Oatmeal Down the Toilet
December 7th, 2009 by Paul Lucas
“Doctor, I have a problem that’s very strange and very embarrassing.”
“What’s the matter?”
“Every time I defecate…My stool looks like…It looks like…”
“What does it look like?”
“Well…it looks like…bananas and oatmeal.”
“I see.”
“And the strangest thing is that I don’t even eat bananas or oatmeal! Can you help me?”
“Your condition is unusual but not unheard of. Unfortunately there is no known cure or treatment. It is just something you will have to learn to live with.”
“So there’s nothing I can do about it?”
“You can’t prevent your bowel movements from looking like bananas and oatmeal. But you can save 2 gallons of water every time you flush the toilet with Mitch’s Green Flush™!”
I suppose the creators of the commercial for Mitch’s Green Flush decided to put bananas and oatmeal in the toilet because they thought showing real human feces would be just too “gross” for TV. (Even though some other infomercials have already broken that taboo.) What a missed opportunity!
Instead they should have shown a guy who looks like Mike Tyson squatting on the toilet. Then a massive brown load would have been shown inside the toilet before being flushed. This would have effectively shown viewers that not only does Mitch’s Green Flush save water but can handle even the largest of human bowel movements.
Ah! I was trying to send a message through the site, but kept getting a 404 message, so I’ll have to invade Mitch’s Green Flush to ask if you’ve seen the SodaStream infomercial yet. (http://getsodastream.com)
There’s mall and talking head testimonials, claims of being a “green” product , and of course the ever growing homage to Magic Bullet with a Mick and Mimi-esque couple and their overenthusiastic friends.
Comment by Devika — December 10th, 2009 at 4:27 am
Hi Devika,
Thank you for letting me know about the problem with the contatct page. It’s fixed now.
I have not seen the infomercial for SodaStream yet but I’ll set a TiVo dragnet this weekend in fervent hopes of having a look at it.
Comment by Paul Lucas — December 10th, 2009 at 10:54 am
What a load! Seriously! All modern toilets are federally-mandated to use 1.6 gallons per flush or less (thank you, Uncle Sam, for protecting us from powerful flushing action).
The only people who still have the glorious 3-gallon tanks are either using old equipment or have purchased on the black market.
Comment by Ryan — December 15th, 2009 at 4:52 pm
Saw the soda fountain informercial; first thought was “why not just go to the store and buy Squirt?”
Paul, also check out the “Gerry” vacuum cleaner informercial–it’s rather boring, but if you have a dirty mind when listening to it, it’s hilarious.
Comment by Irving Berlyn — January 1st, 2010 at 12:50 am