Slap Chop Commercial: Vince from ShamWow Makes a Triumphant Return
For all you people who hoped Vince from ShamWow was just going to be a one-hit wonder, I must announce that Vince has returned to the airwaves in a commercial for the Slap Chop. I think that Vince Offer is attempting to become the next Billy Mays and using that stupid headset microphone as his trademark.
The SlapChop may look just like the same kind of mini-choppers you can get in any Target or WalMart for a few dollars, but Vince informs us that the Slap Chop will transform our lives. He begins by proclaiming, “You’re going to be in a great mood all day because you’re going to be slapping your troubles away with the Slap Chop.” Sure, your wife may have left you, your home may be in foreclosure, you may have trouble controlling your bowel movements, but you will soon go around with a smile on your face by repeatedly whacking a cheap food chopper. Then Mr. Offer tells us, “This tuna looks boring. Stop having a boring tuna. Stop having a boring life.” Numerous studies have proven that tuna sandwiches are the primary source of boredom in human lives. Thank you Vince for ending that! When telling us how the Slap Chop prevents tears while chopping onions, he says empathetically, “Life’s hard enough as it is. You don’t want to cry anymore.” Oh Vince, you truly are an angel from heaven with a New Jersey accent.
Actually, it is hard to see what the Slap Chop offers that similar choppers do not—other than that it is easy to clean and will make your strawberries magically sparkle:
Like the Magic Bullet, the Slap Chop is a small unit. So small in fact that most of the items Vince chops look like they were pre-cut just to fit. And would anybody really be satisfied with the mélange Vince audaciously declares as “Salad!”?
The other interesting thing about the Slap Chop commercial is that it is hard to know which of the humor is intentional and which is unintentional. I am convinced that Vince dramatically tossing a chopper into the sink behind him was an intentional bit of humor. I’m not sure if his pronunciation of “freduccine” was.
The line that will be most quoted from the Slap Chop infomercial is “You’re going to love my nuts.” I’m pretty sure this is an intentional double-entendre from Vince. If you have seen Vince’s film The Underground Comedy Movie, you know his sense of humor can run to the lewd. (And if you have seen The Underground Comedy Movie, please accept my condolences for the permanent mental and emotional scars you have suffered.)
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81 Responses to “Slap Chop Commercial: Vince from ShamWow Makes a Triumphant Return”
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Comment by Sarah on December 17, 2008 at 10:05 pm
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He’s laying it on a little thick in this one. Also, I think that the “tuna” he added was really cat food. The producers of the show figured he didn’t deserve real food. Also also, how is chopped up pickle, egg, and ham a “breakfast to go”?
Comment by Emilin8r on December 18, 2008 at 1:17 am
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You’re going to have an exciting life now
The day chopping food makes my life exciting is the day I strangle myself to death for having such a pathetic life.
Comment by Fiar | Conservative Satire on December 18, 2008 at 5:24 am
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Unfortunately those douchebags whined to youtube about your video but I found it elsewhere anyway.
But I’m confused, is this product an anti-depressant or a cheap food chopper that’s pretty useless, think of it as a hand driven magic bullet.
Comment by TimNRA757 on December 18, 2008 at 11:41 pm
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Or is it supposed to be a weight loss device or possibly something just to entertain ourselves?
Comment by TimNRA757 on December 18, 2008 at 11:43 pm
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TimNRA757, thanks for letting me know that the video had been removed from YouTube. Fortunately, I found another copy of it.
Comment by Paul Lucas on December 19, 2008 at 10:18 am
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The name sounds like a noise made during sex………
Comment by Sparkle on December 19, 2008 at 11:12 am
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Does Vince clean his nuts with Sham Wow
Comment by harold H on December 19, 2008 at 12:03 pm
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Vince, you’re a typical one-hit-wonder. You have a surprise success the first time and then try to copy the formula and amp it up a bit from last time because, hey, why not?, people loved it the first time. But the magic is already gone. And you sound too much like Joy Division.
Love,
M.Comment by Mel on December 19, 2008 at 12:17 pm
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In todays world where some people are sad about something or the other, I find that this guy can at least make you laugh, even if you don’t buy the product. At least its getting a lot of attention or i would’nt be writing this and you would’nt be reading it. LOL
Comment by Terri M on December 20, 2008 at 2:37 pm
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I had to google to see if it was really true. Was this truly ShamWow vince, or just a sad impostor? Sure, it may be the man, but the magic is gone.
Comment by earthtonegirl on December 21, 2008 at 9:52 am
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Aw, now, don’t hate. You wish you had homeboy’s mad skills.
Comment by Chico on December 21, 2008 at 10:50 am
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Man, I thought I had no life; Googling an infomercial. But reviewing an infomercial star? If blogs were the “thing” in the 90’s, you would’ve been able to blog your way to a mini empire.
Comment by bilo on December 22, 2008 at 2:45 pm
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It’s good to see that Mr. Offer has put on some weight and done away with the faux-hawk. I guess he made enough dough-re-mi off the ShamWow to afford to fill his AZT.
Oh, don’t act like you never thought it…
Comment by Johnny Fargo on December 24, 2008 at 10:18 pm
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“you’re gonna love my nuts” this thing is full of sexual induendos.
Comment by LOL on December 28, 2008 at 2:22 am
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Vince is actually a comedian. He probably looks at this whole thing as a joke. I know I laugh my arse off at it. He’s getting paid to sarcastically sell a product that he’d never use…does it get any better? I wonder if he and Joel McHale are friends??
Comment by Jennie on December 28, 2008 at 9:09 pm
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bilo – You do have no life, never fear. YOU are commenting on a review of an infomercial star…
I like Vince, he’s totally non-threatening. I can picture him standing outside of a New Jersey quicky mart. While everyone goes by he says “Yo, it’s Vince” in his endearing Vince-like one eye squinty way. Like an excited puppy wanting to be petted, people can’t help but respond: “Yo Vince.” Then Vince smiles his one-eye squinty smile and is happy until the next person passes by. Maybe a group of teenagers will stop by and ask him to buy a 12 pack of Miller lite… Ah, serendipity…
It’s only natural Vince pursue a career in sales, Vince is a people person. That and they won’t let him drive the school bus anymore after he took his pants off on the bus to celebrate the Christmas break… At least they didn’t press charges. How could they, it’s Vince, yo.Comment by Mike on December 29, 2008 at 1:17 pm
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Hey, regards to comment 17, im glad you googled serendipity, wouldnt want a typo in a blog…O NO…p.s. its pat not petted, hey proper grammar
Comment by Mike on December 30, 2008 at 6:26 am
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This is without a doubt the most amazing, incredible, awesome infomercial ever created. Vince is a marketing god.
KNEEL BEFORE VINCE!
Comment by david on December 31, 2008 at 8:51 am
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The Shamwow is nothing more than a big sponge.
A sham compared with Vince’s late night ad in which it looks like it will soak up liquids if it’s in the same room.
When will I learn “as seen on tv” is just that?Comment by steve on December 31, 2008 at 7:38 pm
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While what he (over)sells is crap, Vince is a rising star in the TV Infocrap world. Who cares what he sells. If I’m going to watch TV I’m going to have to endure somebody’s commercial. Lines such as “you know the Germans make good stuff” and “linguine, fettucine, martini, bikini” are instant classics. And if you can’t trust a guy who talks and dresses like a slick carnival hocker who can you trust?
He reminds me of something out of Good Fellows or the Sopranos and there’s nothing more entertaining than watching the third cousin of a New Jersey mobster attempting to hock crap you don’t need (or even want). Now if he could only get his relatives to whack Billy Mays using only a Sham Wow, Fix It Pro and a Snuggie.
Vince is OK in my books. I’m entertained. More power to him.Comment by Ian on January 3, 2009 at 9:10 am
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“Slap away every day”
Comment by Matt on January 3, 2009 at 2:28 pm
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“Slap away every day because its so easy to clean”
Comment by Matt on January 3, 2009 at 2:31 pm
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“Your gonna love my nuts!” LMAO
Comment by Jon on January 5, 2009 at 9:39 am
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if i don’t eat tuna, can my life still be more exciting
Comment by spearsty on January 5, 2009 at 11:28 am
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Gahahaha! This is a shame… no that’s an understatement. Has he no shame?! lol, ‘you’re gonna love my nuts’ I think he started talking like that on purpose. He makes me so annoyed. How is eating unchopped tuna boring? What a creeper!
Comment by Lulu on January 5, 2009 at 8:41 pm
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This is the greatest product since the Salad Shooter!!
Comment by Intercaust on January 6, 2009 at 3:33 pm
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They tried to clean up his image a bit from the meth induced craze it looked like he was in during the Shamwow commercial. He wasn’t as spastic and he seemed a little more personable in the slap chop. Looks like it would work ok as intended but what kind of portion does it provide? Looks like it would feed a dollhouse tea party or Betty Crocker Easy Bake Oven sized appetite.
Also do you notice half his face (the side with the headset and stroke) is in the dark shadows. Pretty sure this is done intentionally.
Comment by kma on January 6, 2009 at 8:20 pm
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Who chops up red potatoes and mushrooms together! LOL
“Salad! I love Pizza too, but once in awhile get the veggies in. At least throw them on top of the pizza.” LOL!
“Stop have a boring tuna, stop having a boring life.” LOL!!
Of course the favorite: “You’re going to love my nuts.” LOL!!!
“Life’s hard enough and you don’t want to cry anymore.” LOL!!!!
“The skin comes right off.” As he turns the skin so you can’t see that the onion didn’t come off the skin. LOL!!!!!
“We’re going to make America skinny again one slap at a time.” HAHA
My current IM nick: “Tacos Fettuccine Linguine Martini Bikini” HAHA!
“You get the Graty absolutely free.” Queue Announcer quiet voice: “Just pay a processing fee.” HAHA!!This commercial rocks. The perfect gag infomercial but still selling a real item. Awesome!
Comment by Bulletz on January 7, 2009 at 12:55 am
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VINCE OFFER IS SOOOOO HOTT!!!!
Comment by MRS> OFFER on January 7, 2009 at 11:35 am
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Vince is a marketing genius because he is master of a marketing technique first innovated many years ago: making up a problem that you didn’t realize you had, then promoting your product as the prefect solution to this here-to-fore unindentified problem (see: “Ring Around the Collar.”)
In this commercial, it is, of course, the until now woefully underreported bane on American life and culture: “having a boring tuna.” Thank you Vince for saving us from this hellish situation!
God, Vince is annoying. I grew up in New Jersey and I moved 3000 miles away to get as far as possible from guys like him (lived in California 20 years). But entertaining as hell. I’ll take a Slap Chop for free, but I ain’t buying one.
Comment by Scott Mercer on January 8, 2009 at 3:36 am
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I LOVE Vince Offer! He’s the best. Just seeing him on TV makes me happy. Sad, but true.
Comment by PT on January 8, 2009 at 10:33 am
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Vince is too funny! Commercials have taken over television, radio, and the net. It’s nice to have one that’s funny and entertaining. He saves us from boredom. I’m waiting for him to pitch an ED product.
Comment by Krafty_Momma on January 8, 2009 at 11:28 am
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I love this guy, here’s my take on it:
http://www.fallinglast.com/2008/12/31/review-slapchop-infomercial/Comment by Bryan on January 8, 2009 at 1:56 pm
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““you’re gonna love my nuts” this thing is full of sexual induendos.”
And the Magic Bullet isn’t? THe name Magic Bullet itself is sexual innuendo, and I think everybody already knows the Berman and Hazel innuendos.
Comment by Darth Chaos on January 9, 2009 at 6:07 pm
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If Paul Walker and Buster Poindexter had a love child, it would be Vincent Offer.
Comment by Art Cadbury on January 12, 2009 at 2:07 pm
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When I saw this, it made me laugh like a madman.
This is just another example how Vince can take a piece of crap and turn it into gold.Comment by Candace on January 12, 2009 at 4:06 pm
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Ya gotta see my nuts! l0l
Comment by Noah on January 12, 2009 at 10:06 pm
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At least I don’t have to turn the volume down a dozen notches like I do when that creepy Billy Mays come on screaming at the top of his voice! Holy smokes, I turn off his commercials just due to his screaming volume and his wild gestures! And, the slap chop is kinda funny, wonder how many takes it took to toss that other chopper into the sink? Still, I think I would be nervous if Vince (or even Billy) moved into my neighborhood!
Comment by Veebee on January 13, 2009 at 3:50 am
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Vince could sell poop. He’s the Bob Braun of our day.
Comment by Don on January 13, 2009 at 3:56 am
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And don’t forget the clever “If you call in the next 20 minutes, because we can’t do this all day…” It’s as if he’s ‘live’ and doing this just for our benefit. I do agree though that the ‘tuna’ looks a lot like cat food.
Comment by DK on January 17, 2009 at 6:15 pm
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i love this guy. he could sell refrigerators to eskimos and convince them they will prevent food from freezing.
keep ’em comin’, vince baybee!
Comment by jerryr on January 18, 2009 at 7:09 pm
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Hey this is Vince, just buy the slap chop, all of you have boring and pathetic lives, I mean you are talking about infomercials on the internet, the Slap Chop will make you love your life, get you a promotion and get you laid by the pretty blonde in your office…. Come on, you’re going to love my nuts!!!!!
Comment by Vince on January 25, 2009 at 6:52 am
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This guy is so annoying!!! I swear…I’d pay more for commercial free tv!! Between him and Billy Mays I want to pull my hair out!!
Comment by Ashes on January 27, 2009 at 11:03 pm
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YOUR GOING TO LOVE MY NUTS!!!!
Comment by Vince on January 29, 2009 at 10:55 am
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I love this guy, he makes me feel GOOD!! I thought it was sham wow (which we replay word for word at work with each other). Its a great time, but hay its free….and during these times, I need it, Keep this guy in pictures, he has the look and hay, the act. Looks great to me.
Comment by Penny on January 29, 2009 at 7:03 pm
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This guy is a champion! He should be put in charge of the economic crisis!
I also enjoyed the part when he threw the slap chop behind his back and it landed in the sink! Thats some michael jordan jazz right there.Comment by shannon on February 1, 2009 at 5:26 pm
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By 2010 he’ll be selling some Viagra type pill (“if you have an erection lasting more than 48 hours don’t call your doctor – call all your friends and brag, ya schmuck!) and by 2011 he’ll replace the guy with the pencil mustache selling “Colon Blow” (remember Saturday Night Live’s faux commercial?) and, inevitably, he’ll be running for president in 2012. No debates. No stumping. He’ll do the whole campaign through infomercials. (Billy Mays for VP?)
Comment by LIZ on February 1, 2009 at 8:36 pm
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Is that a Jersey accent? I thought it was from the Bronx. Of course, you have to know the ShamWow commercial by heart before you can appreciate the subtle and not-so-subtle humor in this one.
Billy Mays doesn’t even compare to Vince. He has nothing that makes him memorable. I mean, apparently Mrs. Mays doesn’t even love his nuts.
Comment by Sue on February 5, 2009 at 7:57 am
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If that is really Vince of Shamwow and Slap Chop, and unfortunately Underground Comedy Movie on comment #43 and 45, then you should know that the racy double entendre of such a statement of “Your going to love my nuts” is inappropriate and shouldn’t be stated on a commercial on television. It’s no wonder I’ve only seen it once… and people like you spreading filth on television are responsible for the moral decomposition of the world. Somehow I question if that is really Mr. Offer, but just in case. Save yourself before it’s too late!
Comment by Sonnyboy on February 15, 2009 at 6:49 pm
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I LOVE Vince, and CANNOT STAND that obnoxious Billy Mays! I always mute that bearded geek, and won’t even look at him. Vince is funny as all-get-out. Not only that, but Vince at least has a more pleasant voice than geek-Mays. His voice is creepy and high-pitched and the egomaniac makes sure he screeches loud enough so everyone can ‘enjoy’ it. And flipping his hands around. Meth? Vince? I Mays is on something as well as his own self love. I’d like to buy him for what he’s worth and sell him for what he thinks he’s worth – I could donate it to our economy and permanently fix it.
Comment by Barbara on February 21, 2009 at 9:40 pm
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I flippin love Vince he is funny. lol “frett-ichini”
Comment by selena on February 23, 2009 at 10:03 am
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Vince is the freaking BOMB!!! I’m in love!
Comment by Pam on February 25, 2009 at 9:01 am
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Vince is not just excited about this product; he’s excited about people. Vince’s quips and quotes are life-affirming, reassuring, heart-warming, and revitalizing. Vince has found that one product that single-handedly solves all of life’s hang-ups: sorrow, hurt, rejection, feelings of inadequacy, disorientation, self-loathing, and bitterness.
Fortunately for us, he knows better than anyone that infomercials and encouraging statements about life that we all long to hear are a match made in heaven.I utterly eschew all others who fail to grasp this concept.
Comment by Nils Barton on February 28, 2009 at 12:05 am
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If I buy the slap chop will he go away and take LOUDmouth Billy Mays with him?
Comment by Jeanne M on March 2, 2009 at 12:48 pm
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People, this is a complete and utter knockoff of the Pampered Chef chopper. Only consider buying SLAP CHOP if you can’t live without GRATY.
Comment by mlz on March 3, 2009 at 10:58 am
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Hey – Somebody said this is really Ryan Seacrest! And here’s some “Shamwow” trivia – on the package is tells you how to “magically” create “extra” shamwows – by cutting them in half! And you’ll have twice as many! Only in America, folks! The Slap Chop is selling right now on Ebay [there are three listed] and all have bids over $35 – what is this thing selling for on TV???!!!
Comment by sls on March 5, 2009 at 12:49 pm
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Vince is comedy incarnate, but let’s clear something up – that’s not a New Jersey accent; I’ll bet my last dollar he’s from Staten Island.
Comment by Bunny G. on March 7, 2009 at 8:08 pm
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! “You’re gonna love my nuts” has been censored! WTF?!
Comment by Darth Chaos on March 13, 2009 at 7:46 pm
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The first time hubby & I saw this commercial, we simultaneously jerked our heads around and looked at each other with disbelief, and then had a good laugh. Personally, I wouldnt buy the piece of crap….Ive had a quality chopper made by Pampered Chef for many years… but this commercial is hilarious. Its “uniquely typical” advertising! lol
Comment by Mrs. V on March 14, 2009 at 6:36 pm
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I have to say that I laughed outloud when I saw the Slap Chop commercial. What’s wrong with a person having high energy and enthusiam, especially in our depressing econonmy? It may just be another product but at least he sells it with pizazz and he doesn’t yell at you like Billy Mays. I like his style, it is old school selling with some fun adult humor.
I may not buy the product, but I don’t have a problem with Vince.
Comment by Noah Creamer on March 15, 2009 at 1:00 pm
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Wow…no kidding huh? I saw the comment (months back on this blog) someone had said something about him selling a product that he himself would not use…it does get worse, he is not just selling it, he owns the company, so he is also the middle man, if he is a self made millionaire, he is the one laughing all the way to the bank…
Comment by Sandy on March 15, 2009 at 8:15 pm
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He’s selling these things to fund a lawsuit against the Church of Scientology. I doubt he’s trying to get rich or make anyone laugh (unless they laugh on their way to the phone to place an order). He’s already stuck in most of your minds…what’s the harm in buying one?
Comment by K. O. on March 26, 2009 at 6:34 pm
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YOU ALL ARE IDIOTS !!!!
ALL YOU PEOPLE GET A LIFE !!!!Comment by NYPD on April 7, 2009 at 1:49 am
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I hope he isn’t a millionare.
Comment by Sonnyboy on April 7, 2009 at 7:23 pm
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Comment by dan marino on May 3, 2009 at 9:48 am
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Comment #50 is almost as hilarious as the commercial. Lighten up dude!
Comment by suzapalooza on May 4, 2009 at 5:07 am
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hey “LOL” you fuckin tool, thats cus it is a sexual induendo…dumbass
Comment by SUPAMAN on May 8, 2009 at 7:52 am
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#64, u dumbass, u got on here too…toolbag
Comment by SUPAMAN on May 8, 2009 at 7:56 am
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Vince is amazing!!! He sells his product with enthusiasm and humor. This is one of the few infomercials that I actually ENJOY when it comes on. I don’t know how well the Slap Chop works, but the ShamWOW is excellent. It really can hold 10x it’s weight in liquid 😀 Also, the Rap Chop made me love the commercial and Vince even more 🙂
Comment by Kim de Caluwé on May 11, 2009 at 1:45 pm
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Best song ever.
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/2a11a16645/slap-chop-rap-remix
Comment by Alicia on May 15, 2009 at 8:54 am
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I can’t watch the commercial without hearing the rap remix. Vince Shlomi annoys me, but I can’t help but laugh every time I see the commercial now, because the remix is so well made; I love it. Wouldn’t buy the Slap Chop, though; plenty of products that do the exact same thing that I can get for five bucks at HEB.
Comment by Ami on July 8, 2009 at 1:11 am
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Just a note to let you know that long before the slap chop was advertised Pampered Chef sold the product at home parties. I purchased one about 10 years ago and still use it on a daily basis. the design may be a bit different but the rest works the same as the pampered chef one
Comment by Marianne Faber on July 28, 2009 at 10:10 am
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At the end it says beware of imitators. Why? Will they hurt us by slap chopping us to death?
Comment by Maddie on August 15, 2009 at 9:44 am
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who is this guy? yr going to love my nuts… yr kids can do it w one hand… they’ll love em…
f*ck this dark-side sh*t. he’s wrongComment by leo on September 2, 2009 at 1:03 am
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RIP BILLY MAYS!!!!
VINCE IS BETTER THOUGH HE ,SELLS AND OWNS THE RIGHTS TO SHAMWOW AND SLAPCHOP!!!
VINCE RULES!!! I SAW HIM ONCE AT KMART IN CHULA VISTA ,CA IN 2005Comment by Lgzlink1 on October 27, 2009 at 1:16 am
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Unfortunately I made the stupid decision to buy this piece of junk. I will never buy anything that this guy is endorsing again. I tried it once and it took way longer than just using a chopping knive
Comment by jeremy on January 8, 2010 at 10:30 am
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Vince ….. a one track man ….. hookers and slap em … make your life happy … someone should chop his nuts with his slapchop
Comment by Yvonne on January 16, 2010 at 3:07 pm
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Genius marketing technique. The psychological aspects of Americans these days isn’t exactly “innocent” by any stretch of the imagination. Using sexual innuendo is simply a way for him to speak our language and therefore draw us in for more sales. We’re all here because of our dirty minds and his excellent technique of telling us what we WANT to hear. Thumbs up for non-conformity.
Comment by Veronica on August 19, 2010 at 10:24 pm
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love his infomercial, Vince is a marketing genius!
Comment by mark on March 25, 2011 at 1:46 pm
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Is the happy Hot dog man the next Kentucky Fried Chicken guy?
Comment by Parker Oilar on July 28, 2018 at 12:32 am
“Linguine, fettucine, martini, bikini!” Why, that’s my holiday menu! The Slap Chop will save precious minutes that I would otherwise use julienning swimwear.