The Bootlegger Wraps a Mini-Bar Around Your Ankle

The infomercial for the Bootlegger pretends that it is targeting cheapskates who don’t want to pay full price for booze:

But anyone who watches the Bootlegger commercial can see how hard it tries to appeal to skeezy pervs who hope to liquor up some lovely ladies.

When that sleazeball with the dodgy facial hair says, “You ladies are on the wrong team,” he is most likely encouraging them to experiment with lesbianism, and he provides the alcohol to help loosen their inhibitions so the girl-on-girl action can get started forthwith. Seriously, that guy couldn’t act more like a slimy drug dealer if he tried.

The Bootlegger is a gimmick for desperate losers to get women to touch their legs by offering them “free” drinks.

The next version of the Bootlegger infomercial will offer a bottle of Rohypnol as a free bonus.

The good news for you ladies is that you can put Bootlegger “underneath your knee-length skirt.” Perfect for any woman who has trouble getting felt up by drunks.

In addition to earning a “Best Male Presenter” trophy for the “I’m the Bootlegger” guy, this infomercial will surely win a Moxie Award in the “Most Convincing Use of Stock Video in a Short Form Infomercial, Under $50k” category. You will notice that the infomercial opens with a nighttime football game…

…yet the spectators are watching it in the middle of the afternoon.

I hate it when games go into overtime!


  • 6 Responses to “The Bootlegger Wraps a Mini-Bar Around Your Ankle”

  • At the beginning of the commercial that girl complains about the price of beer. I would like to see someone try pouring a beer into one of those little bottles!

    Comment by euGene on March 8, 2012 at 5:28 pm

  • Especially great in airports!

    Comment by Hellbound Alleee on March 8, 2012 at 9:01 pm

  • Those guys definitely look like the type that would say the “high school girls stay the same age” line from Dazed and Confused.

    (Hell, any guy that would buy this product has probably said that line at least once.)

    Comment by BOTR on March 8, 2012 at 10:04 pm

  • Hahahahaha! There is so much greatly wrong with this one. I don’t know why but I think my favorite bit is the pouring sound effect that manages to be WAY louder than it should be, regardless of context.

    Comment by Chives on March 9, 2012 at 4:10 am

  • This makes things a hell of a lot easier for date rapists- now you don’t even have to drop the Rohypnol tablet into her drink when she isn’t looking!

    Comment by Lance W. Korn on March 11, 2012 at 12:04 am

  • LMAO! What better way to look like a sleazy alcoholic!

    Comment by mike ski on October 14, 2012 at 2:17 pm