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Cobra StunLight: The Return of the Cheesy Self-Defense Device Infomercial
I received emails from people telling me to be on the look out for the infomercial for the Cobra StunLight personal protection device, which combines a flashlight, laser, and pepper spray. Ridiculous Infomercial Review reader Melanie described it to me as “the second coming of the Myotron Pulse Wave.” Unfortunately I have not been lucky enough to see this infomercial on TV or capture it on my TiVo dragnet.
However, reader Alan Koch was kind enough to send me a link to some clips of the Cobra StunLight infomercial online.
The Cobra StunLight does indeed appear to be the second coming of the Myotron Pulse Wave, complete with fear peddling and cheesy crime re-enactments. Check out this clip where a granny fights back against two intruders:
The most remarkable thing about the scene with the old lady is the type of people who are committing the burglary. Back in 1996 political correctness forced the creators of the Myotron Pulse Wave infomercial to feature racially-integrated street gangs. These days political correctness has gotten so bad that the Cobra StunLight infomercial has two white girls breaking into a house—a prospect that I’m sure keeps so many people cowering in fear each night. And they didn’t even try to make the actresses playing the would-be burglars look like the kind of tattooed, meth-addicted white trash that might actually commit this kind of crime.
In this next video we see surveillance camera clips in which the Cobra StunLight pepper spray flashlight saved the day (For some reason they don’t allow embedding of this video so click the link):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MnD90WeS9ds
It’s not clear if these are actual surveillance videos or just phony scenes made to look like surveillance videos.
The Cobra StunLight infomercial is hosted by the ubiquitous Erica Shafer (who will likely join the ranks of such prolific infomercial hostesses as Forbes Riley, Nancy Nelson, and Darla Haun):
My question is: Did Sheila Griffin just graduate from Starfleet Academy?
Anyway, I can’t wait to see the entire Cobra Stunlight infomercial for myself!
Comments
9 Responses to “Cobra StunLight: The Return of the Cheesy Self-Defense Device Infomercial”
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Comment by Scott Mercer on September 3, 2007 at 11:05 am
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That first video made me really laugh. I don’t know why, but that old lady sounds like she telling them to go away in the same tone she would offer them cookies…
Why does that guy throw his suitcase, though? I thought he was stealing it. I have to admit, though, it is hilarious to see his arms flail as he falls back.
Comment by Conservative Cat on September 3, 2007 at 9:52 pm
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1. “Captain C W Jenson”, infomercial producers always name people this way. Captain of what, being a retard?
2. Why is it called a stunlight, the light doesn’t stun anyone, and that pepper spray looks like something Eric Cartman used to fight off the hippies a while back.I guess what they’re saying is that a flashlight and laser pointer is supposed to distract us enough to take a face full of pepper spray.
Darryl Gates would have been proud to have used this.
Comment by River Styx on September 5, 2007 at 7:48 pm
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C.W. Jensen really was a captain of the Portland, OR police dept. He also worked at Portland’s NBC station KGW and for some talk radio shows as sort of “police expert.”
Comment by Parapluie on September 14, 2007 at 11:44 am
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this thing is actually used by police in certain districts. it may actually be useful.
Comment by max on January 28, 2008 at 12:23 am
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Nothing like a polo shirt-clad, ponytailed teenage girl to really scare the hell out of an old lady, I guess.
Comment by Canaduck on March 25, 2009 at 9:48 pm
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What a joke
Comment by codethreeback on November 27, 2009 at 11:21 pm
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If repair is ever needed forget it. I tried w/ no results.
This company is no longer in the USA.Comment by Lee on September 27, 2011 at 7:20 am
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The company had re-located to Dallas, TX
Comment by Pablo on January 19, 2012 at 5:22 pm
In spite of the relatively high production values of this infomercial, to my eyes it is quite obvious that the “security videos” are not real. They did do a respectable effort in making them look real, I have to say. But the actions are just too staged.
It is quite entertaining to see the “perps” howl in pain and drop to the ground over and over again, so I’m putting this high on my list of classic infomercial moments.
I don’t think Forbes Riley or Nancy Nelson could’ve handled this hosting duty. They just don’t have the gravitas needed. Too perky. Maybe Anthony Sullivan? Certainly not Billy Mays, he’s too much of a goofball. Maybe they should have got John Bunnell from “Real Stories of the Highway Patrol.”