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Action Alert: Big Mother is Watching You

Here is one product that will be popular among viewers of To Catch a Predator. The Action Alert software constantly monitors your child’s Internet activity for “any evidence of online dangers.”

The best part of the Action Alert infomercial comes at 1:11. When one of the moms asks how the software will let parents know about suspicious activity, host Jake Meyers turns to the camera, flashes the Jazz hands, and enthusiastically belts out, “WITH A TEXT MESSAGE!” At which point everyone expects Jake to break into a song and dance routine about the joys of spying on your kid’s computer. Instead, he merely returns to his product demo, to the disappointment of all.

Action Alert lets paranoid parents view a recording of their child’s entire computer activity. And what parent wouldn’t be happy to spend countless hours reading thrilling chats like:

– what r u having 4 dinner?
– idk. maybe a hot dog 😉
– omg i havnt had hot dog in soooo long lol!
– i rlly need 2 buy new clothes

The other interesting thing about the Action Alert infomercial is that the host is surrounded by four women. Aren’t any fathers concerned about their children’s online activities? Maybe these ladies are actually worried about their husbands interacting with suspicious characters and disreputable websites.

Comments

  • 6 Responses to “Action Alert: Big Mother is Watching You”

  • But what keeps the kid from just unplugging the Action Alert and doing a hard reboot?

    Most young ones I know will do this in a heartbeat alongside downloading one bazillion virii and toolbars.

    I’m still trying to clean Mighty Magoo off the PC at work (19 year old workstudies fiddle around on it).

    Comment by Jeff on September 7, 2011 at 10:21 pm

  • LOL I agree with Jeff above. My younger sisters figured out how to download Limewire back in the da and were always crashing the computer with their dodgy downloads. They too downloaded about one bazillion toolbars.

    I bet you $10 that at least 85% of kids today know more about computers than their parents do. To me it looks like action alert is a flash drive…I mean couldn’t you just take the darn thing out? Parents that are that concerned about what their children are looking at on the internet are going to be monitoring it pretty closely to begin with…ie not letting the kid on the pc alone.

    Comment by Lindsay on September 9, 2011 at 7:23 am

  • The website for the Action Alert is silly. It states that the regular package costs 29.99 + S&P. But, for ONLY $20 more, you can get: 1 FREE additional year of monitoring, FREE tech support, and a FREE USB computer light! Only $20 for some FREE stuff! Oh…wait a minute…

    Comment by Jennyfire on September 9, 2011 at 7:41 am

  • @Jeff and Lindsay: The guy in the infomercial says that if Jessica takes the drive out while she is on the computer, it won’t work. (But I’m sure — and I agree with you — that Jessica will find out a roundabout to circumvent this issue.)

    Comment by znkp on September 9, 2011 at 7:07 pm

  • Cyber bullying. Extensive pornography viewing. Chatting with dangerous adults. All reasons why someone would want to buy this product. But if you’re a busy, workaholic parent, spying on your children using Action Alert can also be a great way to learn more about them and their interests.

    “So Jimmy, you like looking at pictures of dismembered corpses? You remind me so much of myself at your age!”

    Comment by Kevin Truefaux on September 11, 2011 at 3:30 am

  • Judging by the lack of fathers, I’m going to guess the creators of this infomercial are all women that have referred to their husbands as “baby-sitters” at least once.

    Comment by BOTR on January 15, 2012 at 12:05 am

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